Diesel Head

You know you're a "diesel head" if....

  1. You keep a cup of diesel fuel on your bedside table because the aroma helps you sleep.
  2. You've ever dabbed diesel fuel behind your ears before a date.
  3. You scoff at trucks when you realize they are gassers. (see #36)
  4. You ever hooked up and towed a trailer, just because you CAN.
  5. You don't unhook your trailer from your truck because it really makes no difference.
  6. You have ever got stuck in a drive-thru because you forgot the trailer was still hooked up.
  7. You've drag raced your diesel truck.
  8. You get "aroused" when you hear a diesel engine or a turbo whine.
  9. Someone comments to you how loud your truck is and you reply, with a grin and a chuckle, "Ain't it, though!"
  10. You don't think your diesel is loud enough so you remove the muffler so you can "hear" it better. (This also applies to turbo silencer rings)
  11. Regardless of outside temperature, you still roll down the passenger window when in tunnels, under bridges, or beside Jersey walls, just so you can listen to your truck "sing".
  12. You have your right rear view mirror tilted down so you can "admire" the smoke from your tailpipe.
  13. You're always watching the mirror after the turbo spools up so you can see how perfectly your smoke cloud formed.
  14. You continue to watch your rear view mirror to see how the traffic behind you deals with your smoke cloud.
  15. You say "YEAH!", "YAHOO!", or any other shout of joy if you see that you stopped at least one vehicle behind you with your cloud. (grinning from ear to ear doesn't count because you do that even when there's no cloud, as long as you're driving your truck)
  16. When you aren't driving your diesel truck, you roll down the window at traffic lights to hear ANY other diesels that might be around.
  17. You have more than one turbo on your CTD. (CTTD)
  18. You hold down the smoke pedal just a little when your starting your 12 valve, just so it shoots a big puff of smoke.
  19. When you make your friend drive your truck down the road, just so you know what your "audience" hears when you ride by.
  20. You keep 36 bags of cement in the back of the truck most of the time because while you don't notice any difference in power, the truck rides nicer.
  21. While maybe not a truck, you're trying to get the wife to drive some kind of diesel powered vehicle.
  22. You finally get your wife to drive a diesel powered vehicle, you can't wait to bomb it.
  23. You start talking about getting a new vehicle and your wife says that she wants to trade in her Jaguar on a new CTD.
  24. You respect lesser diesels than the CTD just because they are diesels.
  25. You put the cat in the garage and put the new turbo in bed.
  26. You can guess what diesel is in the truck coming around a corner before you see it.
  27. People look at you strange when you run down the driveway waving at the UPS truck.
  28. Folks leave the campground because your talking to all the diesel owners about BOMBing and those folks don't know what BOMBing means.
  29. You aren't driving your truck, you're on the Diesel Truck Resource web site conspiring with other diesel heads.
  30. Alert sounds on your computer are your favorite diesel engine(s) starting up or running.
  31. You've ever raced a ricer with the gooseneck trailer hooked up.............and won.
  32. You like to take people for rides in your truck so you can show them how MUCH your truck smokes.
  33. When someone says they have "twins" your first thought is of turbos and how they are setup.
  34. You feel guilty because you're not spending enough time with your truck.
  35. When someone mentions their "other half" and your first thought is they are talking about their truck.
  36. You find yourself looking for the number of lug nuts on a truck to make sure it's "qualified" to have a diesel before you look for the diesel name plates or big tailpipe.
  37. You can recognize the smaller rear end cover of the lesser 1/2 ton axles and know instantly it is a lesser truck.
  38. If you have ever driven somebody else's diesel truck and felt as if you were cheating on your own.
  39. If someone mentions "B1" or "B2" and you think of turbos, rather than the bomber airplanes.

    The next four are from a valued member of our armed forces, in this case, the US Marines.

  40. You opt to take on a fourth tour to Iraq to fund your new injectors and turbo.
  41. Your girlfriend leaves you because you don't caress her like you do that "damn truck".
  42. You wash your clothes with a tablespoon of #2 just to get that fresh diesel aroma.
  43. You love the smell of a truck stop parking lot more than fresh brewed coffee.
  44. You read this whole list smiling and nodding your head.
  45. You're now thinking of one that wasn't mentioned here.

Many contributions to this list courtesy of Diesel Truck Resource members. Thanks guys.

If you have a contribution to make, please send it to Me (at) Stamey.Info (anti-spam address)

One more thing. Thank a member of your armed forces today. Without them this page might not be in U.S. English.